


Find You

by limjaeseven



Series: Verse 2 [6]
Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: Angry Park Jinyoung (GOT7), Angst, Fluff, M/M, Sad Im Jaebum | JB, Sad Park Jinyoung (GOT7)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-04
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-15 20:35:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29195415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/limjaeseven/pseuds/limjaeseven
Summary: Jaebeom tries to apologise to Jinyoung, but what happens when the younger doesn't accept the apology?Verse 2: Part 6 of 8
Relationships: Im Jaebum | JB/Kang Seulgi, Im Jaebum | JB/Park Jinyoung
Series: Verse 2 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2132364
Kudos: 14





	Find You

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanted to say a big thank you to everyone who left kudos and really sweet comments on the previous parts of this series, it means the world to me. Thank you for reading and investing in this story, I hope you enjoy this part and the rest of the series.

It felt like fate was laughing at Jaebeom as he tried everything he could to get in touch with Jinyoung. The guilt just magnified so much more as he felt what it must have been like in Jinyoung’s shoes while he was hospitalised.

He saw Jinyoung on the news every couple of days, the film had become quite a big hit and people had been curious about the fresh face in it. Jinyoung looked like he was excited about the success of the film and his future in the industry but only Jaebeom knew his smile didn’t really reach his eyes, having known the man all his life.

Mark was helpful in getting updates about Jinyoung since he had joined the same agency as Jinyoung after college. He told Jaebeom about how miserable Jinyoung had been in the four months he had been admitted and recovering, about how he never left the house and spent his free time crying.

It took a week after the premiere for Jaebeom to muster enough courage to show up at Jinyoung’s door. It felt like he was eighteen again, his breath still smelling of alcohol after that first fight they had in high school. He sighed heavily as he pressed his fingers against the doorbell, not hard enough to ring it. After ten minutes of panicking and almost leaving twice, he finally let himself ring the bell, knowing that he would have to finally face Jinyoung.

Seeing Jinyoung’s messy hair and bloodshot eyes made Jaebeom forget all the excuses he’d come up with to tell the younger. He looked like he had lost a significant amount of weight, his skin pale and forehead creased.

“Hyung?” The shock in Jinyoung’s voice was clear and it hurt Jaebeom.

“Jinyoungie”

“You don’t want me and that’s okay” Jinyoung chanted, as if he had trained himself to say that if he met Jaebeom ever again. The tears welled up immediately in both their eyes, for two very different reasons.

“I’m so sorry Jinyoung, I didn’t mean to disappear like that, I’m so sorry” Jaebeom chanted over and over again but Jinyoung didn’t seem to be hearing a single word the elder was saying.

“You don’t want me and that’s okay”

“No it’s not Jinyoung. I love you, so much, I messed up. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness but I’m so incredibly sorry” Jinyoung seemed to snap out of head at that. Looking down at Jaebeom, his eyes narrowed and nothing short of anger took over his mind.

“Where were you for so long? Do you know how worried I was? I went to your apartment and they said you’d moved out. What happened to us being best friends, hyung?” Jaebeom didn’t know how to answer the younger, he couldn’t tell him the truth, that much he knew, but he couldn’t let go of Jinyoung either. He had to take full responsibility for breaking his heart, he just hoped he would forgive him like last time.

“You’re still my best friend Jinyoung, but life was happening, I didn’t have time to think about anything, Seulgi was the only reason I am alive and sane. You know how I am, remember how it was like when I was editing Icarus?” He lied through his teeth and he knew he’d have to pay for it someday but Jaebeom would do anything to keep Jinyoung happy.

“That doesn’t mean you can’t give me a single call or tell me you’re moving! I had to ask Seulgi to give you my premiere tickets because I couldn’t find you. I wanted you on set so bad, I wanted you to be with me as I shot my first professional movie. I was there for you when it mattered to you, but when it was something for me, that mattered to me, you were nowhere to be seen. How is that something a best friend does, hyung?” Jinyoung spewed words that hurt and Jaebeom deserved them, he thought.

“I was there at the premiere” Jaebeom muttered.

“So I hadn’t just made that up had I? But you weren’t there during the screening were you? I waited for so long hyung, and all you did was show up after everything was over, and you don’t even have a proper excuse for it. If I don’t matter to you, say it clearly. Say it so that I don’t get my hopes up again, say it so that I don’t wait for you to call me back, say it so that I don’t wait for you, forever” Angry tears rolled down Jinyoung’s cheeks as he tried his best to keep himself together.

“I need space. Last time I let you go way too easily, we were kids back then. I need some time to think about things, hyung. I’ll call you” Is all Jinyoung said before shutting the door in Jaebeom’s face.

Jaebeom didn’t remember how he got home, he just remembered that the moment he stepped in he said the words ‘we’re over’ before collapsing onto his bed. He didn’t remember how much he cried, all he knew was that he would fall asleep every few hours and wake up to cry some more. It took him over two days to finally get out of bed and eat some food, drink some water.

He knew it wasn’t really his fault and that telling Jinyoung would basically solve everything but he shut that thought down as soon as it came to him. The damage that it would do would be so much worse. He realised then what a horrible person he was to leave Seulgi, someone who had been by his side through tough times like that. He imagined Jinyoung like that, waiting outside the hospital, not knowing if Jaebeom would come out alive or not and it was enough to remind himself to never tell Jinyoung.

Without the permission to contact Jinyoung, Jaebeom attempted to get back to his normal life once more but it wasn’t easy. The first thing he did was apologise to Seulgi, he knew they were over and Jaebeom knew in his heart that what she had done to Jinyoung, even if it wasn’t her fault, would never allow him to look at her the same way again. He apologised to her parents too, who helped him through the hospitalisation. They were nice enough to forgive him, which just made Jaebeom feel more guilty because he didn’t feel worthy of their kindness.

Jaebeom didn’t know the apartment he was in like his own, Seulgi having moved in after he was admitted. Fortunately she had rented it only for a few months since they expected him to be out by then meaning he had just enough time to look for a new place.

Scrolling through some listings, he noticed the old apartment he shared with Jinyoung vacant. He didn’t think twice before calling up to move back up. By the end of the next month he was back in his room, just the one next to his was now empty.

The days without Jinyoung blurred together into Jaebeom overworking himself and coming home to cry till he passed out. On the days he felt extra lonely, he slept in Jinyoung’s old room, imagining his scent on the sheets, the warmth of his embrace on days that they slept together.

Seulgi had become Jaebeom’s everything in such little time, he didn’t think of anything else. He realised he hadn’t texted Jinyoung for three months straight even before he was hospitalised. They had been such big parts of each other’s lives it was no wonder that Jinyoung felt replaced. The guilt seemed endless to Jaebeom and he felt like he deserved it all. Part of him wanted that Jinyoung never forgave him for what he did to the younger.

It took three months, three months of Jaebeom not leaving his apartment unless it was for work, three months of him barely eating anything, of him crying himself to sleep, for Jinyoung to call. Jaebeom had finally taken a day off after his boss noticed his state and the distance between him and Seulgi and forced the man to take some rest, when his phone rang.

Expecting it to be his mom, Jaebeom reached over for his phone that was lying on his bedside table and placed it to his ear without checking the caller ID.

“Hyung?” The sound of Jinyoung’s voice made Jaebeom sit up immediately from where he had been lying in bed, his brain malfunctioning after not having expected it.

“Jinyoungie” Jaebeom knew how broken his voice sounded but he couldn’t help it, his throat was dry from the shock.

“Can we meet?” Jaebeom immediately dragged himself out of bed as he made a mental note of the café Jinyoung asked him to come to. He cut the call before running around the room to find something decent to wear. The dark circles were too prominent and however much concealer he put on them, they were still visible so he threw on a pair of sunglasses before heading out the door.

Jinyoung was already there when Jaebeom reached the place, sitting by the window, dressed in an oversized sweater and jeans. Jaebeom couldn’t help but smile looking at the younger, though he didn’t look like he was doing too well, he still looked perfect to Jaebeom. The feelings he’d had about Jinyoung all his life surfaced as he let out a sigh and pushed the door of the café open.

“I’m sorry it took so long, hyung” Jaebeom just smiled, pulling sunglasses off to look Jinyoung in the eyes as they sat in front of each other. Jaebeom would have waited for the rest of his limited days if he had to for Jinyoung, he knew that through and through.

“I don’t blame you, Jinyoungie. I want to say once more that I’m really sorry for what I did” Jinyoung nodded, his expression one of understanding. As much as they fought, Jinyoung could never really be mad at Jaebeom, the man was his entire world.

“I still am not over everything that happened but I know you’re sorry and I want us to get back to how we were. I miss you, hyung. So much, it hurts. I know you would want to spend your time with Seulgi but can we at least try to find some time for each other?” Jaebeom’s face faltered as Jinyoung mentioned his ex.

“Seulgi and I, we broke up. More like I broke up with her but we’re not a thing anymore” Jinyoung looked surprised.

“Oh, I’m sorry, hyung”

“Its fine, Jinyoungie. I always have time for you, yes I’ve not proved that over the last few months but you’re my best friend, Jinyoung, and I’d give you the whole world if I could. I moved back into our old apartment, you know the address, come by anytime you want to. Here-“ Jaebeom said, digging into his pocket for his spare key he had grabbed on the way out, “With this you won’t even need me to be home to get in.”

“You moved into our old place? Alone?”

“I just missed it a lot, no other place really felt like home after I moved out of there” Jaebeom confessed.

Things weren’t fine between them, but they knew that there was not a life for them without each other. Jaebeom made sure to visit Jinyoung on set as often as he could and attended every one of his premieres to show that he really wanted to make amends.

Jinyoung did eventually move back in with Jaebeom, and as a way to let Jaebeom make up for his mistakes, made him promise to take him to the T Junction in Hokkaido that Jinyoung found online which the elder happily agreed to. 

**Author's Note:**

> Any kudos and comments are much appreciated. Follow me on [Tumblr.](https://limjaeseven.tumblr.com/%E2%80%9D)


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